Opportunity Costs

1-2015-11-18My boys had fun at the audition by Media Corp and J was selected for the chinese drama. Later on, we were also contacted and boys acted as calefes with Andie Chen and Rui En. We went with excitement to Mediacorp and waited. And waited. And waited. For a good 1 and a half hours before a bus tooted and sent us to the venue for some action. After the several bumps into Andie Chen takes, they took a break and bumped him again. From this, I realised the opportunity cost of acting is the lost of time in waiting. Actors really need lots of patience! We were glad to have this experience prior to the drama scheduling as it helped me make a more informed decision. The opportunity cost of acting means a lost of precious time waiting and precious holiday time without us. In short, we withdrew from the Chinese Drama filming for J.

We were initially tempted by the money but it really wasn’t worth the work they put in, nor the time being apart from us. In retrospect, I am relieved and glad that we had made the decision to do so. Ever since I started my heavier part time work, the holidays felt like the only chapter left not torn out from my storybook of time. We had to prioritise. Family time or enriching activities? Your priorities may differ from us. Whatever the case, family time is our top most priority with my change of SAHM to Part Time working mum status since Term 4 of 2015. : )

I have yet to blog about our Hols Bond time at the church camp, our Ipoh and Malacca road trips, the visit to Gardens by the Bay (again) and preparation for J’s Primary One. That would take some time since there’s loads of photos to collate and collage. My hubs even signed up for a new sport for the boys- inline skating! The guys bonded significantly in this balancing act and got their dose of warmth from the sunshine and papa’s time! He got the lobang from groupon by the way.1-2015-12-281For now, I want to capture this new moment before the year moves on, to recap and learn from 2015 while moving forward in liberty growing into 2016.

A recap of my 2015’s 15 Things I will do differently.

1) Write more letters and make cards for others.

2) Be more consistent in my exercise routine.

3) Try out more new dishes for family and do together with the kids. (WIP)

4) Read aloud regularly to all my kids once again

5) Renew my thinking about punishment (WIP)

6) Make extra effort to do something out of the ordinary for my  hubby.

7) Start the day with a Praise Song (WIP)

8) Learn a bit more on the mechanics of blogging (WIP)

9) Encourage kids to pray for others. (WIP)

10) Throw away un-recycled stuffs! (WIP)

11) Stick to the Word the Lord impressed upon me. (WIP)

12) Treasure my current time with kids till future changes.

13) Create.

14) Start to develop photos and organise children’s artworks for an album

15) Revive Chat time with each child during bedtime. (WIP)

The cancelled items simply means I am satisfied with my effort made and thus ‘fulfilled’ them for last year. It doesn’t mean I will therefore stop doing it. My focus probably will be on the Work In Progress (WIP) items for this year and continue my lifelong resolution of living a healthy and active life e.g no. 2). Another focus would be our service in church. We want to serve others and not be caught up in our own tiny world of family life. This in turn would teach the kids that they are to grow in service to others and not expect us or life to revolve around them.

Many don’t ‘bother’ to make resolutions as they feel can’t keep them. I think otherwise. If I keep my resolutions

  • Realistic
  • Reasonably Timed
  • Specific
  • God focused

Even if I do not achieve my ‘targets’ or ‘goals’, I am nearer to my goals than before. I regard my resolutions as a stepping stone/ indicator of the direction I am making for myself and my family. When I plan and commit my steps to the Lord, it helps me see the line that I’ve marked in my life journey. This allows for a better perspective of whether my life is in tandem with the ultimate goal we have heavenward in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Even as I type the above right now, I realised how precious this blog has been in giving me tangible and fresh insights to who I am, how I’ve spent my time and what flows out from my heart.  I keep a private diary and recollecting the journals gives me immense joy and gratitude witnessing the judgement of God at times, as well as the tender mercies and the undeserved grace.

A recent conversation I had with a Full Time Working Mum stopped me in my tracks. I had offended my dear friend when I gave my 2 cents worth of how we ‘should’ pay more attention on the young child while we can to instill the good habits before it’s ‘too late’. In a nutshell, it was presumptuous of me to think I ‘know better’. I absolutely don’t.

I didn’t know of the financial burdens she had to bear for the families- her own with kids and the extended family. Being a sandwich generation where there’s an older generation to provide for and her own children to support, she needs to work late hours. Unbeknownst to me, she still tirelessly slots in time to guide her todd with story readings and spiritual coverings nightly AFTER her late hours. Her child has no choice but to sleep according to her timings. This lady has a great heart, for God and man. The thing is- the Lord also gifted her a passion like no other in her workplace.

As we shared our hearts frankly and genuinely, I was blessed to be her friend. I had good intentions but I also had incomplete understanding. What I don’t get is- how does a full time mum have the energy to care for their kids after work? I for one, do not have the capacity to work fulltime due to my limited energy level and lack of home support. I cannot imagine how others can do so. My friend wisely refutes- ‘that’s YOU. It’s not me….. God will teach us.’

Her answer pricked my heart and I realised I had been using my own experiences and encounters to ‘predict’ or judge others. What I had failed to recognise or remember is the Lord’s hand is in EACH of US, His precious child who put our hopes in Him. God is the ultimate One who will determine our paths, teach our children and NOT ME nor YOU who may have put in little effort or for that matter ‘super mum’ efforts.

As I pondered upon this truth, I thank God for this revelation that each of us are truly unique and so is our family dynamics. With an insecure background that I had as a child and teenager, I am a living example of the transformation that took place in my later years.

I can provide my children with the ‘best’ efforts of parenting on my part,

BUT I can NEVER lay the FOUNDATION of Christ in them

Nor can I cause them to Grow like the flowers of the fields.

My recent devotion thought seals this lesson and humbly reminds me not to take pride in the works of my hands be it spiritual influence or any other growth.

1 Corinthians 3

6 I planted, Apollos watered, but God gave the increase. 7 So then neither he who plants is anything, nor he who waters, but God who gives the increase.

10 According to the grace of God which was given to me, as a wise master builder I have laid the foundation, and another builds on it. But let each one take heed how he builds on it. 11 For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.

However, this does not mean we can take things easy and not do the hard work of planting, watering and tending the garden entrusted to us. We do it with reverence and care while waiting for the Lord’s timing in its growth. May all Glory Be To God!

How has 2015 been for you? May You

the FULL time Working Mum,

the Part Time Working Mum,

the Stay At Home Mum,

the Homeschooling Mum,

the neither here nor there mum

in short THE MUMS and DADS, take heart, know that our Lord will be the one who will teach them Himself and cause them to grow in His Time and Will. May we be privileged to be a part of that growth, learning from the past and looking forward with confidence knowing our hope is not in the works of our hands per say but in the Person of the Living God.

Thank You for journeying with me and the support given by reading GrowingHearts123. Blessings to 2016!


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  1. Amen and Amen! One of my goals this heart is also to build up faith my my family and be more faithful in attending cell group. May we achieve what our hearts desire and be enabled and empowered by the Lord’s strength. Have a blessed year Angie!

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